Fun

As Christmas time approaches, it appears many in Congress may indeed receive that well-deserved lump of coal. Whether it’s protecting millionaires from having to pay taxes or cutting the unemployment lifeline for jobless workers, those like Rep. Todd Akin must truly be into the taking rather than the giving spirit of Christmas.

Unfortunately our dear friend Todd Akin has not given Missouri families an opportunity to sing this holiday season with his many questionable and regretful decisions this past year.

With no further delay, I present the “12 Days of Akin” holiday carol, sure to warm the hearts of the many without a payroll tax cut or at risk of losing their jobless benefits this year.

“The 12 Days of Akin” …

Fun, it two parts:

h/t Gotcha Media

Franklin County Dems' Randy Phillips: "The following is a brief excerpt of the Nieves Concerto in B Major, a lilting, lyrical arrangement featuring the vocal styling of local loud mouth, Sen. Brian Nieves, accompanied by violinist, Claude Schmieckeldorf Johannson III. One can hear Brian’s true, Christian, family values bubbling up from the depths of his soul..."

Happy Friday.

h/t Eli Yokley and Bungalow Bill

NEWS ALERT! 
From:  Situation Room, State Auditor’s Office

Reported at this hour, a Schweich Swat team will be parachuting into the St. Louis area at 2300 hours, where they will proceed to conduct a Schweich Strike on city schools after receiving a anonymous tip of miscalculation of school attendance for devious purposes.

A backup team composed of the Green Eye Shade Brigade will amass under the Arch should more fire power be necessary.  Auditor Schweich will observe the raid in real time from the Situation Room set up in Peter Kinder’s secret suite at the Chase.  (FYI: Light refreshments will be served; dancing and arm wrestling at 11 p.m.  Non-audited event)

It is unclear at this time just who is being targeted.  However, area sources claim that Peter Kinder has been a conspicuous drone, hovering about the city in recent months and possibly a courier for the Auditor’s office in his spare time.

This is not the first hit on the St. Louis Public Schools, but it is the first precision strike, announced, staged and conducted for live television.  More on Fox at 10.

Great stuff.

The funniest part of the whole evening may have been The Donald's scowls, not the jokes.

Sen. Jolie Justus offered the following proposal for Missouri's new Congressional districts very late last night:

It's March, y'all.  Tournament time.  Time to ignore your actual work, family and personal hygiene to focus on how you'll complete your tournament bracket, and then wallow in misery when it all goes bust.  

In years previous, such madness may have been limited to a single 64-team tournament of a single sport played by a single gender.  Not this year. 

This year, you have the First Ever Fired Up! Tiger Blood Tourney over which to obsess -- and in which you may participate.

Here's how it'll work -- we've tried to keep it simple so that even our state legislators can understand it all:

• We're gonna have a 64-person bracket in which Fired Up! readers will be asked to vote on head-to-head matchups according to the arbitrary and poorly defined criteria outlined below.
   
• The public will have a day or so to vote on each round, and whoever has the most votes at the end of the round moves on.  Sixty four will become thirty two, and then we'll all vote again.
    
• Fired Up! readers (this means you) are invited to submit names for individuals to compete in the bracket with the forms below.  You may also send any submissions to @FiredUpCommish or commish@firedupmissouri.com (We'll keep whatever you send confidential, of course.  Your boss already suspects that your productivity is going down the toilet, and we don't need to be a part of that mess.)  
    
• The Selection Committee will consider all submissions and publish a bracket late Sunday night, broken down as follows: 
    
  
  • The Renaissance Regional - 16 elected officials 
  • The Coffee Zone Regional - 16 consultants, staffers and party leaders
  • The Press Gallery Regional - 16 journalists
  • The Open Mic Night Regional - 16 bloviators, ideologues and partisan media types
      
• Then we vote.
     
  
• This is a multi-partisan affair, and it's meant to be fun. So don't get all huffy when your favorite politician gets trounced by a blogger you've never heard of just because she or he mobilized more voters that you did. 

How do you know who will make for a good contestant?  And who should you vote for?  Here's a hastily prepared guide...

The Washington Post's Fix blog has unveiled their lists of the "best political tweeters/tweeps in each state," compiled from nominations on Twitter over the past few weeks (how else?).  Missouri's list includes @tonymess,@virginiayoung, @clairecmc, @stlactivisthub, @sarahfelts, @patricialicious and@bshelly. 

For fun, here's what MO's finest are tweeting about today...

Here's video of Coach Mike Anderson's address to the House earlier today, as posted by the Missouri News Horizon.

I think persons of all stripes can agree that the world will be a better place if Mizzou finishes strong, with four or five wins before the Big 12 Tournament. Go Tigers!

Happy Wednesday. 

h/t TPM

h/t Huffington Post

This is a pretty great photo from the Post-Dispatch, but their bland caption about how was standing next to whom (St. Louis Police Chief Daniel Isom, Harris-Stowe president Dr. Henry Givens  and the birther-curious Sen. Roy Blunt, in case you're wondering) is woefully inadequate. 

Have great caption ideas?  Leave 'em in the comments. 

We all make mistakes.

National political analyst Stuart Rothenberg included state Sen. Chuck Purgason in a post-election piece for Roll Call last week -- listing him as one of five men with the "Worst Political Hair of the Cycle."   Also on the list: Charlie Cook, Florida Governor-elect Rick Scott (bald), Ohio's Steve Chabot... and Stuart Rothenberg. 

"One bald guy, one guy who traded his toupee for the naturally bald look (but still lost) and a guy with a comb-over problem. Plus, two analysts who sometimes have hair issues. I’m forced to disqualify myself," writes Rothenberg. 

h/t JohnCombest.com, image from CBSnews.com

Image credit: ESPN

Hilarious and not hilarious at the same time.

h/t Huffington Post

Apropos of nothing, we bring you a speech by Councilman Phil Davison of Minerva, Ohio to the Stark County Republican Party. He really, really wanted the GOP nomination to run for County Treasurer, as you'll see.

We now return to our regularly scheduled programming.